stress♥

i seriously cant keep up with waht i feel now ....i wanna study hard .but there isnt any mood for me to do that .i wanna continue & tolerate further cos i believe so but i realise ,things arent getting better..if only i hope that time could rewind ...i wanna get into express if not in 2n1 ,i wanna get a new life ....if only i studied hard and get into a better class or school.but now is too late for regrets ...but to prove it i wanna study but there isnt any motivation as well .the environment at home makes me feel like stress only..i wanna jun come into beattyy...but badly she cant...i wanna go green bean tuition but my family disargee...nothing goes waht i hope it is..the shadow is over me again....i wanna pour my feelings out ..but i cant.i wanna this year faster over so it can be a better year next year .now only band & drawing makes me feel the best.i should have gone to yuying ,although i dont regret coming into beatty ,it helps me to experience everything i seriously hope everthing changes.i had a flash back of waht i thought ..in a blink of eye 7 months passed that quickly ....another 5 months that will be end of the year .i wanna study with jun .i wann cry out loud .but is there a choice ? no i dont.even if i wanna transfer ,mother wont allow.hais....i wanna acomplished waht is left for me to do.and start a new life .especially .......only jun knows.so that i can be myself again .teh old one or is it the simple one is primary school.i just hope i can acomplished wahtever is now left for me....please ....







xoxo.
---eileen












i thought friends were great
but i was wrong
i thought life will be better here
but i was wrong
i thought these were true friends
but i was out of the way i thought
i wished there will my precious here
but they wasnt
now all i hope is to study hard and get into a better environment....